Anthony Perl: Influence.

Let's wrap up this series.

What is it?

Who is it for?

How does it help you?

How do you actually use it?

So many perspectives from

different people.

We've invited Kirryn Zerna back to wrap

this discussion up.

Whether you attended the recent

Influences event or not, doesn't matter,

you don't want to miss this episode.

Lots of gems to unpack, lots of

things to, to think about for

yourself and might influence your

clients as well.

Influence you, influence others.

Let's get into it with Kieran.

Well, I'm so glad to have Kirryn Zerna

back on the podcast.

Kieran, welcome again.

Uh, it's, was wonderful to have

you, uh, uh, have you… have been

at the event that you led a couple of

weeks ago, so thank you for coming back.

Thank you so much for having me.

It's, uh, great to, uh, be able to

recap on just such a great experience,

and I'm just so thrilled to be with

you and in your very capable interviewing

hands, and I can't wait to what

this conversation unfolds.

Well, uh, I think we've

got to start with something, and I

think, uh, uh, I want to say too,

there's a lot of people who are

listening out there at the moment who

perhaps weren't at the event, and they

may have watched some of the videos

and the, uh, the podcast from before.

But I think what I want to do before

we get into some of the heart of what

was discussed at the event was ask

you to describe what influence

actually is.

Well, the influencers event

was, I reckon, a wonderful

smorgasbord to look at influence from

lots of different, um, perspectives.

So, you know, we've got the dessert,

the main… Oops.

W- wrong way.

Entrée, main and the dessert.

Um, and- I'm all for starting

with dessert, by the way.

Yeah.

Exactly.

Um, the way that I think

about influence is that we…

Starting with the concept of a brand,

you know, the idea of that we know

about, uh, say, Coca-Cola as a

brand, and I used, um, in my session,

used that great quote by Walter

Landor, who was one of the guys

who worked on that famous copywriting

that said, "Products are made in the

factory, but brands are created

in the mind."

And I think for us as leaders, as

business owners, as, um, you know, people

in our own right, trying to buy, lead,

sell influence, um, when it comes to

what is influence, it, it is the

ability to influence the perception that

people have of us.

Um, to influence the, um, perception

that they might have of us as a leader

and our capability.

To influence the perception that they

might have of us as a business and what

we serve and the value that that is.

Um, to influence the perception

that people have of us as people.

So are we who we say we are?

Um, will we do what we say we will do?

Um, influence is like that tool

that enables our effectiveness to

do those things.

So I, I think of it like a tool.

That's probably a long answer,

but that's how I think of influence.

It is like a tool for us to be able

to do the things that we wanna do.

Anthony Perl: I, I… Yes, I

think that's in- incredibly powerful

as well because, you know, we, we

kind of mentioned it in the previous

podcast, but people tend to…

The, the term's been hijacked

a little bit by people who are

jumping on TikTok and thinking that

that- Mm … is just purely influence,

and there is so much more to it.

I, I, I think that, um, one of the

interesting things about the whole idea

of where influence can take you is for

me, and it's one of the reasons why

I just want to say at the beginning

for people that are listening in under

the Podcast Done For You banner,

is that podcasting is such a powerful

tool because the number one reason

people listen to, to podcasts is for

a shift in mindset, and that's what the

ability is, right?

That is what influence is, to

shift someone's mindset, even

if it is just a small amount.

Mm, absolutely.

And I, I think even what you

were saying about influencers, like,

like that's, that is what they're doing

as well, isn't it?

They're trying to shift that

perception or shift someone's mindset.

Um, for them it's about creating

that story of whatever it is that

they're trying to create it around.

Is it about gaming?

Is it about beauty?

Is it about their life?

You know, they're creating a story,

uh, and they're using influence as

a way to, uh, shift the perception that

people have of that.

But I agree with you, I think

podcasting, um, is a brilliant way to

go deeper onto a topic, go deeper

into an idea.

Um, and yeah, just a good plug for

you, I think, um, because I think it

allows it, you know, what you might see

in a glossy, um, website or in a

PDF or a brochure, um, gives you the

surface level, but the podcast is

the conversation that goes deeper.

And, and when we do go deeper, that's

when we build that trust with people,

that's when we build that connection.

Um, and yeah, so that not only do

we think something differently,

but we actually engage more deeply

with something or someone.

So it's a very powerful

tool, I agree.

Yeah.

I think trust is, is one of the big

themes that came out of, uh, the

whole event as well.

So rather than just diving in on trust,

I want to probably go through each

of the speakers first to take…

give someone the, give everyone a bit

of the key takeaways from each of it.

And for those, again, that weren't

able to attend the event, to give you

a bit of an insight as to what each

of the speakers, uh, had their,

as their theme.

So if we, if we can run through

them all.

Um, Russell Pearson, of course, who both

of us know very well and was on, uh,

an episode of this podcast as well.

What did you get as the key takeaway

from what Russell was talking about?

Yeah, and even just to take

a step back before, and I know we talked

about this in our setup, that when

Russell and I got together to put this

event on, um, and I know Russell and

I both mentioned this, it was during

the heart of COVID when everyone was

locked down, and it was reminding people

of the abilities and ways that they

could communicate, um, in their work,

in their every day, and, uh, giving them

tools to do that.

And so when we designed the

program, that was very much in mind.

How can we, through different speakers'

stories, insights, and ideas, give

tools and, um, practical tips

for people to, um, become better

influencers in their spheres?

So yeah, Russell was great.

He kicked us off with the idea of

what influence is, and again, he

was setting that out in the concept

of becoming the obvious choice.

Um, what is it that we do?

How do we become that obvious choice?

And what are some of the strategies

that we can use?

And he used a great little, um, a game

at the beginning which, um, was

reminding us about the way that we

prime people, um, or prime ideas.

Um, he did his little magic

trick, which is a great way to…

You know, w-when we're thinking

about if we want people to think

something, then, you know, again,

reminding us we need to be intentional

about seeding those things.

It's not about, sometimes about

magic, it's about intention.

And so he showed that through

networking, through collaboration, um,

through strategic business decisions

that we can put ourselves as the

obvious choice when it comes to, uh,

people in business.

It's funny, uh, I think it's when we

both came up of-- This is for those

of us that are watching online.

I've got a little Post-it note I've

got next to my, um, computer which says,

"Become the obvious choice." Um, it

is an intentional thing that we can

do, um, to be that, um, top that people

think of when they're thinking

about your category or your service.

It takes intention, and he gave some

great insights.

What did you get from it?

Yeah, I mean, I think

that it was, it was really interesting

because I, I, I've, you know, and I've

heard this from Russell before,

where he focuses in on the idea of

also connections.

And, uh, for me, that's one

of the keys, is actually building

relationships with the people that

can connect you with those, uh,

that you might want to deal with.

Because often we just go zero in

on, on just, "Okay, I need to talk to

this person." But sometimes getting

to that person takes a roundabout way.

Yeah.

And I, I think when you can… And, and

often those people that know that

person know other people that can c-

you can connect to and open a whole

lot more doors.

And I think that's one of the, the

keys, uh, for me, was trying

to understand how influence is about

that broader picture of finding the

people who might be at the top of the,

of the tree, but they're not n- that

doesn't mean that they are the person

that you necessarily want to do business

with, per se.

And I think that was the- Yeah … that

was the idea that I think really

stuck with me.

That's so good.

I love that.

Um, and you know, the meta example

of that was working with Russell with

this particular event, which is

a good lesson, I think, for

those listening.

So Russell and I are both speakers.

We're not event planners, but when

we went to put this event on, it w-

really was about using the strengths

and skills that we both had, and

that is so his skillset, is being

the connector.

Even before the event, he

was going to networking events,

he was talking to people, he was

connecting them.

Um, and he, bringing in sponsors and

working with people, that's like his

strength, about knowing who to ask

and what to ask, and that really did

bring so much to the event as well.

So I think he not only talked about

it, but he embodied it, and it's a great

reminder for all of us in business, um,

that, yeah, being able to c- create

connections with people, um, create

collaborations, not only brings you joy

'cause you get to meet and work with

other people, but it also attracts

more eyeballs, more, uh, attention

to the work that you're doing.

Uh, I think that it,

it led beautifully into, and I think

this is one of the things that I loved

about the event and why I think

it's logical for us to work through

the speakers for everyone today,

is because there was a really nice

synergy in the way things went from one

speaker to the next.

And, uh, I think hearing from Sean,

who's obviously a long-term friend

of yours, and I think we spoke a

little bit about him in the previous

podcast, but you know, that was a

really interest- it was a really

interesting dynamic.

So let me start with this in saying that-

Mm … it was very clear to those of us

watching that you're not just a friend

of Sean's, but you actually admire

and he has had an influence on you.

So d- were you aware of that?

Well, yeah, certainly.

I've, um, I think like many of us,

we've, uh, had careers or worked

in lots of different capacities and, um,

working 20 years ago, it's like, oh

my gosh, I can't believe I could

be w- anything 20 years ago.

Surely I was early zero.

Um, but in fact, no, I was in the

workplace and working in Westpac

at the time, and you know, I was in my

early career stage and you really do

notice, um, leaders that bring people

with them, leaders who make things

happen, and leaders who also aren't very

good . And Sean was just a, a really

effective leader.

He brought people with him.

He was, um, someone that I admired,

um, and just I've watched and tracked

his career over the last 20 years,

mostly on LinkedIn.

Um, and it was actually a real

pleasure to be able to reach out to

him and ask if he would participate

in this interview.

And he really did, I think it was as

if we just, you know, 20 years had

passed like that.

He was as consistent, as

influential, as inspiring today

as he was, uh, in the past.

And yeah, so for those of you who

weren't there, um, Sean is the

CEO of the Retail Bank of AMP.

Um, he joined the bank around the

time of the Royal Commission, um, into

financial services, which, uh, you

can imagine was a particularly, uh,

rocky time, both from a reputational

damage point of view and also very

unsettling within organizations.

With my background in banking, I know

this firsthand.

Um, and certainly I think what he

did in terms of steadying the ship,

um, was significant, but also what he's

done in the m- more recent years

is he's launched a digital first bank.

So he take, has taken on, uh, a

bank which has been around for

100 years, um, and created a bank for

small businesses, which was fast and

nimble and digital.

And so he's kind of running a, a,

a startup in a large organization.

And you can imagine with, well, I can

certainly imagine 'cause I've worked

in this space, but the amount of

stakeholders, the amount of people

that you need to, uh, gain agreement

from and influence to- towards

your decision is significant.

So it, it really was, I found, um,

and I'm curious to hear what

you thought, an inspiring story to

hear how you can also take people

on that journey when not everyone's

gonna agree with you

Yeah, and I think what

I really got from listening to Sean

as well is that, I mean, there was,

there, there were two aspects to it as

me, but, to, to me.

But the biggest one was, uh, listening

and reassurance.

I think that, you know-- And then,

you know, if I cap on the back of that

is, is relationship building and not

being afraid to go to the s- at

the smaller level, and, uh, I've,

I've got an example of that from my,

from my own past.

But I think that the key really is,

is that listening and that reassurance

because things go wrong in any

business, right?

I mean, that's obviously in a

bigger scale when you have a royal

commission involved.

But any business, any day, there's

something that goes wrong or some

little thing that you can learn from.

And I think being able to listen and

reassure people and improve upon

it means that you can build that

trust with people because nothing is

gonna go perfectly all of the time

And listening

reassurance and there was one thing

that he said that I thought really stuck

with me, which was he said, "I, in my

role as a leader, I say I don't know

more than this is the way it is."

And I think, like, that takes a huge

amount of courage, and I think it's

a relief because it's almost a

fallacy to think that we know the

way all the time.

Of course, we don't know.

That's where we need curiosity.

That's where innovation

comes from.

And it also sets the tone that,

um, and, you know, there's lots of data

that suggests that when we can create

a safe workplace where people can

say, "I don't know," or "What if?"

or "Should we try that?" Then

actually, that's where innovation,

um, flourishes, and so does creativity.

It's a, it's psychological

safety.

Um, so yeah, I thought that was

also just a really great thing to

hear from one of Australia's, you

know, top leaders.

Yeah, I, I think it's

incredibly powerful as well because

when you say, "I don't know," there's

an easy, "Oh, he's just stupid.

He should know that." And I think

that's what stops us from saying

I don't know a lot of the time.

Mm-hmm.

Because we like to bluff our

way through and-

That's right

… Anthony Perl: think that we'll

work it out.

And, and that's one of the terrible

things about, you know, Google

and AI, right, is, is because-

Mm-hmm … you kind of sit under

the table and you do your two-second

quick research and you hope that

you've suddenly got the answer

to it rather than actually knowing it.

And I think s- sometimes when you

say, "I don't know," either people will

say, "Well, let me explain it to

you," or they'll admit that they

don't know either, and then you can

start going, "Well, we have a problem

here." Might be a small problem- Yeah

… but then it's how do you actually

resolve that and work together

to resolve that?

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

It's, it's, it's a great possibility

for the future.

So he was a great one, and then we

went into another interview with,

um, Russell.

We kind of went from one stage s-

side to the other, and Russell invited

up Georgia Deb, uh, Deboos, um,

from The Voice.

Gosh, it's been wonderful getting

to know her.

She was a contestant on

this year's Voice.

Um, she did her first audition.

None of the chairs turned.

She went back off stage.

Um, she was talking to her family, and

a big sign came up that said, "I

want you." And when she saw that, she

was like, "What?

What's happening?" She went through

this tunnel.

It was like, watching it on TV,

I thought, "Gosh, how did that work

in real life, walking through

this weird tunnel?"

And then she walked through and saw

Tones and I, who was a secret judge,

who said, who worked with her.

She did another audition, all four

chairs turn, and yeah, so it was

just a delight hearing her story.

And I thought it was, and I'm

interested to hear what you thought

about it, but I think particularly

from my side, what was inspiring is

that if you've got a gift, you've got

something you're passionate about,

um, there's gonna be lots of times where

we get knocks, we get knocked down.

Certainly for my business as

a speaker, I get knocked down

all the time.

But the courage to know what you're

passionate about, not give up, grit

your teeth, become as best as you

can, and try again.

What did you take from it?

Anthony Perl: Yeah, absolutely.

I mean, I think that whole idea of

being vulnerable as well, I think

that's the- Mm

that's the thing, and I think that

came out through a few of the speakers,

but particularly through Georgia,

was that ability to allow yourself to be

openly vulnerable.

I mean, she was in a situation on live

national television.

Nobody turned their seats.

She gets another go.

The worst thing that could happen

is nobody turns their seats again,

and she just-

you know, what does that do?

But I think by being vulnerable, it

opens opportunities.

It reminded me of a quote I heard a few

years ago, which is, "Have you noticed

how when things break, they open?"

And I think it was, you know, that was

really pertinent with that as well,

where, you know, the influence that

you can have on people is sometimes

by being vulnerable and seeing where

that might take you.

And that's the… And, and I think

that's also the lesson of, of shows

like that as well, is because it's

not necessarily about did you win

the show, because that doesn't, that

isn't necessarily what you need.

You can do a lot of things.

I mean, I think we've seen that with

Australian Idol.

A lot of the, uh, a lot of

the people- Yeah

who came second or third have actually

done better than the people who won.

Hmm.

That's so true.

It reminds me of th- when you s-

it's funny you said your quote.

I was thinking of, um, another quote,

which is by Steve Martin, which is,

"Be so good they can't ignore you."

And I think it's an interesting, um,

pathway when you're doing something like

singing or writing or, um, speaking

or podcasting, r- um, I'm sure you

can appreciate from that side that when

you are passionate about something,

you know that you do have a gift or

a strength in this area, and it's that

constant working at the craft, working

at the craft, um, and it's, it's,

it's almost as if that she is…

You know when you're so good you

can't ignore it?

So it's like, don't give up,

don't give up.

So I think it's kind of both.

Don't give up, but also be real

and, um, yeah, that sort of sense

of vulnerability invites people in.

Anthony Perl: Yeah, and I think

there's a belief in yourself as well.

I think that's the- Mm … the one thing

that came across through all of the

speakers, is that you have to have

a belief in what you're passionate

about and what you are able to deliver.

In her case, it's singing, but in

other cases it might just be whether it's

speaking, whether it's delivering

a particular product or service.

If you have a belief in that, then

that, and, and a passion for it, that

can come across, and that's what

influences others to respond to that

Yes.

And that was a beautiful lead-in

to the story of, um, Jules Robinson

and Cam Merchant.

Um, and it's funny 'cause you, you

wanna treat them individually, but

they're also a bit of a package

because, um, Jules and Cam, they

met on Married at First Sight.

Um, and then they… This was actually…

It's funny 'cause they presented

almost like it was a pair because

their stories just matched each other

so perfectly.

But they don't usually do

that- They read their notes

Anthony Perl: before maybe.

Kirryn: That's right.

That's right.

They actually don't usually do that.

So I, I was like, "Wow, you guys could

be a wonderful, um, you know, double

act in a conference somewhere." But,

um, really their stories, I think

particularly with, um, with Jules

Robinson, for those that don't

know her, um…

Well, I know her as a friend.

I've met her in, um, I've known

her since, uh, in my early 20s.

And Jules was always one of those

people you met that just always

looked fabulous.

Like, she always had fabulous hair.

She was always, like, loved

wearing fashion.

So what you see now is ex- just who

she's always been.

She's always been very entrepreneurial

and business-minded, and that is just

the same as who she is today.

She's always been a people person.

She loves people.

She's generous, she's kind, and

she's got the best sense of humor.

And so since she had the success

with this… Really, the success was

finding the man of her dreams,

which is firstly, that was amazing.

But when she got the media attention,

she translated that into, um, what am

I passionate about?

And one was, how could I create a,

a shape… There's a gap in the market

around shapewear, so she created Figure.

And then secondly, she also was very

aware, and, uh, she told the story of

the trolling that she received when

she was on the show.

So what does that mean?

Absolute body shaming, um, for

who she is and what she looks like

and her style as a curvy woman, and

I cannot imagine.

Like, I, I don't know about you, but

Anthony, but for me, like, I am sensitive

if someone's like, "Ugh," you know,

puts a little harsh comment.

Like, but I just can't

imagine someone-

By the way, for people li-

Yeah,

Anthony Perl: it's been-

people listening in, she put a

lot of these comments up on the

screen, and like-

Yeah

… Anthony Perl: oh my God, like I

can't believe s- that peop- I can't

believe people write that kind of stuff

and feel that they can just publicly

write things to shame someone who

was just putting themselves out

there and, and doing a wonderful

job, by the way, and, and, uh- Yeah

it's the first and only season

I've watched of that show.

Um, it was- Oh,

really?

Yeah.

It was, it was, um, but it, but it was

really interesting to see that

reaction and how she responded to it,

and what she took from it as well,

that, you know, on one hand, I think it

probably toughened her, but also-

Hopefully

Anthony Perl: um, you know, and

it, and it has an influence on how

she then delivers and, and wants to

show up each time.

Correct.

And I think to have people saying awful

things about you and your family, again,

is just next level.

But then I wonder if you get to the point

where you know that whatever you do,

and as she said it, she said, "I could,

um, step forward and people would have

good and bad things.

I could step back.

I could step to the side." You know, it

doesn't matter what she does, people

have a comment.

So it's interesting, isn't it?

Imagining for each of us, like what

would you do if what other people said

just didn't matter?

Like what would you do?

Would you, um, influence more?

Would you create more?

Would you be more creative and…

'Cause I have seen that in her.

She's like, and that is what her

story was, she's like, "I focus on my

why, I know what's important, and

I'm gonna do it no matter what." And

it's almost like, as you said, it's

strengthened her, it's galvanized

her, and so not only has she created a

business, but she's created a movement,

and she is, I guess, a, a great voice

and a message for body empowerment.

Um, she's put that focus and attention

to support lots of charities,

um, who support women in similar

situations, and yeah, I've just, you

know, w- were you inspired by that?

Anthony Perl: Absolutely.

And, and, and it's funny, when you talk

about the movement part of it, that's,

that's really an interesting part

for, for me as well, is, is that because

she's created…

Her, her influence is that she zeroed

in on a problem that was her own

problem, you know, in terms of the,

the, the clothing that she could

access, and she's found the audience

that love that and s- and basically the

movement's come out of, "Well, we're not

going to cop this rubbish that, you

know, they can't cater for us," and

built her own thing as a result of it.

So i- it's come from a lot of careful

listening, which I think was a really

critical theme for… A- and, and

it almost seems, I think people think

counterintuitive when you talk

about influence, because people think

influence means that you have to

influence someone.

But that can't happen unless

you're listening to someone, because

if you don't have an audience, if no

one's interested in what you've

got to say, then you're not going to

be an influencer.

So it has to start with the listening

Which was- That's right … you

know, I think her, her very powerful

message that, that happened there

and- Yeah … and then tuning into

who to listen to and who not to

listen to with all the trolling.

Right.

Exactly.

And that segued beautifully

into, uh, her husband, um, Cam.

Um, and so when-- His full name,

Cameron Merchant, for those of you

following along.

Uh, when he, he- his was more of,

um, because he is a keynote speaker, his

was more of a like, "Here's my keynote."

Um, he's just written a new book,

which is called Clarity, and it was

beautiful to hear from Jules a lot

of the why and what she's doing in her

story, and then Cam was, "Well, here's

how we do it." So he focused on under-

like what, um…

He, he kinda used this metaphor of

like you imagine you're watching--

You've got so many different

TV shows to watch when you sit down

at night, and we kind of have this

decision fatigue.

How do we get clarity on

what helps us do the things

we need to do?

Um, and particularly through mindset,

through health, and, um, through

some of those everyday strategies

and habits that can help you do

all of the things that we need to do.

And it was kind of a great balance,

um, in the program, particularly

talking about influence, shifting

perspective, as you said, about

listening, but then it's also how do we

make it happen in the everyday, um,

and particularly for ourselves.

Like, because, um, managing our energy,

um, whether you're a business owner,

you're a leader in a workplace, um,

or a parent at home running a family,

whatever it is that you do in life, um,

if we, if we are not at our best,

then we're not able to do the things

that we need to do.

What did you take away from it?

Anthony Perl: Yeah, I think

very much it was about, um, clarity

and listening to yourself.

I think taking that time to

actually do that and introspectively

and think about what it is that

you want to do and influence yourself,

because I think it's easy to talk about

influencing others.

But if you don't influence yourself,

if you're not showing up in the

right way and doing the things that you

should be doing, then your ability

to influence others is going to be,

I guess, uh, not only minimized, but

potentially you're self-sabotaging

as well.

Because you have to believe in

yourself is, is, was a key theme as

well throughout.

So I thought that was a really

important one, and it's probably a good

segue as well into one of my favorite

quotes, uh, from the, from the '90s.

Can read it off here.

"A thousand moments that begin with,

with, um, hearing your voice." Uh,

I think that that was incredibly

powerful to think about that 'cause

you want people to hear your voice,

but you've gotta hear your own voice.

Yes, that's so true.

And he also, um, I definitely encourage

you all to grab his book Clarity, um,

'cause he's also got some great stories

of, um, from being a professional

cricketer and that transition of

identity, which is true for many of us.

You know, you do something and it's

a highlight season in your life, and

then you transition out of it, and

like how do we manage our identity

in that process?

Um, he was over in those, the terrible

tsunami that… He was actually

in Thailand when that tsunami came

Um, and you know, just seeing

some of those dreadful things

and managing that.

So yeah, just a really interesting

story of, um, also of resilience

through those difficult times.

So, um, definitely a shout-out to

go grab your copy of Clarity.

It's available at all bookstores now.

I, I think as well what

was interesting about that point

is that you are often defined by

such small moments in your life and

how people might remember you,

and that that can have a, you know,

sometimes can have a positive influence

and sometimes can be very debilitating

almost on how you take yourself

out of there.

I, I watched on the weekend, there

was a documentary on Netflix on Norm

Macdonald, the, the comedian, and,

uh, what was really interesting is,

is that throughout his career that he

always saw himself as a stand-up

comedian, did lots and lots of things,

but he's most remembered for four

years that he did on Saturday Night Live.

That's four years out of- Mm … I'm

not sure how long he lived to be.

He was in his 60s.

And so, you know, it's such a small

fraction of his life, but that's all

people focus in on.

And, uh, I, I think it's, it's

interesting how you want to redefine

yourself, and which probably brings

me along to you because you've

redefined yourself, uh, you know,

going from banking to, you know, now

where you are in terms of speaking.

And I love that you spoke so much

about, um, taking the mask off.

So, so maybe what's your favorite,

what's your favorite thing from that

whole process?

'Cause it obviously was quite a long,

quite a long bit that you had on

stage, but what's your highlight

from when you start talking about

taking the mask off?

Well, in particular, I think

we're talking about small moments,

and that was the, the final message

that I landed on too, is that when

we're talking about influence, um,

it's often not one big moment that

creates the shift.

It's actually thousands of

small moments.

And so… And, and actually that's

what in- I talk about the connect

effect in my work, and that's what the

connect effect is.

It's the small moments that make

or break connection that help us to

be better leaders or salespeople or

with our customers.

So how do we influence those

small moments to make those

moments matter?

Um, and in my, uh, s- my section, I

was talking about influence, in

particular about what happens in

the interpersonal connection

with people.

And I… So in my big connect

effect… Oh, I think I just

paused there.

In my big connect effect, I look

at trust, tribe, and thrive.

And trust is kind of the, the baseline.

How do we build that rapport and trust

with people, um, before we create

belonging and before we can grow?

And I looked at trust, which was,

I used the metaphor of the mask.

I happen to have my little mask here

for those of you who are online.

Um, and I guess the concept is with that

is- When you meet someone, whether

it's a client or maybe it's, um,

you're a leader and you've got team-

people in your team, how do we

build stronger and deeper connections

with each other so that we can, you

know, create high performance in our

teams or get that sale, uh, done

or build better relationships?

And the way that we can build trust

quickly is one of those ways that

make that be more effective, and

that's, you know, a big part of

the, the way that we can influence

that relationship positively.

And the mask idea is that often we have

a facade that we naturally will put

up, which is like the outward facade

of who we are.

Um, almost like if you imagine a

house, um, there's the outside of the

house, but inside the house is, is

what, um, is who… the true s- sound

of self or who we are on the inside.

How do we invite people inside the

house is a way for us to do, um, you

know, maybe be able to more effectively

go deeper on a sale or a connection

or a, a customer experience moment.

So I just gave people really

little, um, practical-- We

first of all did an activity in the

room, um, which is how it feels

when you first meet someone, when

you're building rapport and creating

those moments of chemistry, and

I gave them some really practical

ideas about how they can go

deeper quicker.

Um, and there was a few strategies

that we looked at in the room, um, to

do that for like…

And some of the ideas, as you're

saying, about listening, um,

using questions, uh, a couple

of, uh, little strategies like

that to help us go deeper quicker, um,

so that we can do better business and,

uh, build better relationships.

I know we have to

wrap things up in a moment or two, but

I've got two quick questions that came

through from, uh, people, and I put it

out there to people who had attended the

event if they had anything to ask, and

that's influenced a few things.

And yes, influenced a few things that

we've talked about today throughout.

And a shout-out to Paul Dunn,

who gave me some incredible notes

in a presentation from the event.

Uh, one question that came in here

was, "What's the most memorable

moment that you've had on stage where

you feel like you've really connected

and had an influence on people?"

From this particular moment?

Um

No, no, from a- from

any moment that you've had on stage

From any moment.

Well, it's interesting.

We-- I was speaking at a Nutrimetics

event, um, recently, and in the room

there was hundreds of super passionate

sales consultants who are super

passionate about what they do.

And we actually ended again with

the, similar to what we did, um, at

this recent event, where we had all

of the glow sticks.

Um, and it was… The, the metaphor

there is a reminder that in those glow

sticks, there's not just one

fluid, there's actually two.

And it needs a… When, just like us

in relationship, that, that when

there's two people that come together,

there's something that happens.

There's a, a chemistry, there's a

possibility, there's a, a story, there's

a relationship that, you know, could

flourish and bloom.

Um, and so we actually did that

moment with the glow sticks in the room,

and it was truly one of those moments

where not only did the neon lights

light up, but all of their hearts were.

And it was, yeah, it was very inspiring,

I think, to see all of those happy faces

and glow sticks cheering back, um,

as we all remember that it's, there's

something powerful that happens when we

connect with others.

So that was probably one of

the, a highlight, a recent highlight.

Yeah.

And it's such a fun thing to, to

do because you only get to play with

those things usually when you're a kid.

So to actually do it- Correct … when

you're an adult and play around

with them is good.

So last question that I have here,

I'm just gonna read this off here.

Um, it says here, it came from an

anonymous source.

"Who is your favorite

business partner who worked

with you on The Influencers? Asking

for a friend."

Oh my goodness, could that

be Russell Pearson?

Never.

Never.

Anonymous source.

No, truly, I think that was one of the

takeaways of doing the event, um, I

think putting the producer hat on

is, you know when you plan something

and you have all of these tiny little

details that go into that planning,

and then when you finish the event,

to actually see the f- the how all

of those things came together,

not only, um, just stitched together,

but beautifully.

And I think that's a r- a, first of

all, encouragement to everyone.

When you love something and you

wanna put a whole bunch of effort

into it, um, you reap the rewards

of the effort.

That's one thing.

But secondly, the benefit of

partnership.

Uh, Russell was… I think both of us at

our core are similar people, but also

our personalities and our way of

doing things is very different, and

together that was actually a great

combination of skills, personality,

and ability, which m- lifted and

elevated all of the work that we did.

And so it was such a delight

to collaborate and partner.

So I, again, just wanna invite anyone

listening as well, you know, who could

you be working with that, um, not

only does it bring you joy, but also

brings skills, ideas, perspectives,

and helps to you to become better

influencers, um, out into the world?

So yeah, I think from that

perspective, um, that was such

a delight, um.

From… And you know, even meeting

people like you, Anthony, um, our

many sponsors, our MC Maria, um, the

amazing charity partners that

we had as well.

I think the… Well, exactly coming

back to what we started with what,

um, Russell said in the beginning,

that influence are, is also around

those connections that we have, the

people that we get to work with,

and when we create those moments, bit

like the, the glow sticks, we actually

light up and create a better impact

and effect on this world altogether.

So yeah, it's, it's a pleasure.

Well, what a beautiful

way to wrap things up for that.

Thank you so much for being part

of the program.

Thank you for helping put on the

event with Russell.

I enjoyed being part of it as well,

and, uh, I love this discussion.

I'm sure we're gonna have many,

uh, opportunities in the future to

work together again.

But, uh, thank you for the influence

that, that you've had through being

participating in this, uh, and,

uh, hopefully the influences that

you've had on people that have

listened in today.

So thank you again for being

part of it.

Absolute pleasure, and big

shout-out for, um, Anthony and his

amazing business.

Um, you, you definitely, I

recommend if…

Don't do your podcasting alone.

Um, working with such a amazing

expert, um, w- what, what's your

business name again?

Anthony Perl: It's Podcast

Done For You.

Podcast Done For You.

So 100% recommend Podcast Done

For You.

Um, have conversations like

this, and it's such a wonderful way

to communicate, to spread the word,

and to put your message out there.

So thank you to you, Anthony.

W- it's been such a pleasure

working with you.

Thank you so much, Kirin,

and a reminder to everyone, there'll

be a workbook that you can download,

uh, from a link in the show notes so

you can get more information from

this episode there, and also all the

details on how to get in touch with

Kirin as well.

Looking forward to everyone's

company next time on the Podcast

Done For You show.